Smooth Transitions To Our Tweetie Bird

[rabid1st]

In the early morning hours, around 2:00 am today, our beloved lovebird, Tweety, died. He was 19 years old, which is a remarkable age for a lovebird. And he had been suffering with a painful condition for the last 16 months or so. He went into remission in January, and we thought we had solved his issues, but his condition deteriorated again over the last two weeks. Judging by the continuous screaming, he was in unrelenting pain. Only cuddles gave him some temporary relief. And, of course, we could not cuddle him at night. He went quickly, from serious distress to shock to gone in about fifteen minutes. We called the emergency vet, but they were miles away and said they would only euthanize him. So, he died traumatically, but with me holding him close. His little eye looked up and me and finally closed and he went limp.

We feel like we should have done more, had him checked by someone before the burial...or saved him somehow. But he had a long and mostly good life. In the wild, a predator would have killed him the first night he screamed like that. And most pet birds die within five years.

On the Shaman side of things, I believe death is simply a transition. Energy is never lost, but simply moves from the body to another state. The univese is never wasteful with energy. My SO went out for a walk this evening and a baby bird flopped down in front of him on the sidewalk. He called me and asked what to do. And, well, I've "rescued" baby birds before...and been chided by bird experts for ruining the poor bird's life. The upshot is, you shouldn't move baby birds that have a parent nearby. So, I told my SO to look for a parent. Sure enough, there was a cardinal watching.

SO took a photo of the baby with his phone and I searched it. It was a baby cardinal...and fully fledged. So it was right not to pick it up. Just the universe telling us that life goes on. And, as a plus, Cardinal Medicine says..."You should be proud. Not with ego-pride, but because you do a good life-affirming job. You help others." Thanks for that Tweetie Bird. We needed the sign.

Comments

[karie22.livejournal.com]

I teared up reading this. I'm so sorry for your loss. It's never easy to say goodbye to a beloved pet. That's such a special love that can't really be conveyed or understood by those who don't have pets.

[rabid1st.livejournal.com]

Thank you for the condolences. Yes, this is my SO's second pet in his lifetime. His parents didn't like animals or want him to have one. But someone gave him a parakeet as a young boy. It died quickly, I think.

He was very surprised by how painful this loss was for him. But, as I told him, I think animals are a great way for us to connect to creation in a pure form. They love us or fear us based on how we (or other humans) treat them. You know your pet isn't buttering you up, even when they are trying to manipulate you.

[astitchintime-9.livejournal.com]

My deepest sympathy for your loss. 19 years is remarkable, and a testament to your good care. Sad that he was in pain at the end, but if you were holding him, then he knew that you were there with him, for him, and he died knowing that he was safe and loved. May he be at peace now, and may you find your peace with his absence in time.


P.S. - regarding wild babies (birds, bunnies, squirrels, et al), you made the correct choice to leave the cardinal alone while checking for a parent. When it comes to humans' attempts to "rescue" wildlife, the motto is to tell the well-meaning kidnapper to "put the baby back".

[rabid1st.livejournal.com]

Thank you!

And, yes, I have enough bird people around me to have had the lecture about not picking up babies if a parent is nearby. It is just that fledgling birds do look so helpless.

I think I console myself with the idea that we could not save him. We did call the vet and were told that he would be put down in that condition. So, better that we just waited with him, I think, rather than the trauma of rushing him about for no reason. I just felt so useless. So, I'm happy we had a baby cardinal to show us that interfering isn't always the right thing to do.

[thisficklemob.livejournal.com]

{{{hugs}}}

We often feel like we should have done more when a beloved being dies. Somewhere deep down we feel like perfection could have made the inevitable not happen, or made it not hurt. But it always does.

{{{more hugs}}}

[rabid1st.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the HUGS!

I know. This is the thing. I blame myself for his being hurt at all. That I didn't save him somehow. And I wonder if he was truly dead. Even though, he certainly seemed dead. I kept thinking he was moving, but it was just his feathers fluttering. They started falling out, like petals on a flower.

He had a seizure once before and seemed like he was dead...but came back around. However, this time...he just faded into a flutter of feathers. And lay splayed in my hand. And there was definitely pain, beforehand. I am pretty certain he was gone. And...I am also certain that the vet would have put him down, rather than perform some miracle.

I suppose we have to trust that he knew he was loved in the end, even if we didn't save him.

[sensiblecat.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry for your loss. It's quite possible to have meaningful relationships across species. And I understand your distress, it's a great shame he didn't have an easier and more peaceful end. Although I'm sure you did all you could.

[rabid1st.livejournal.com]

Thanks, Cat!

Yes, we do get quite attached. I've never been one for treating an animal as a pseudo-human, calling myself their mum or such like. We always have a sort of cross-species accord. But, I've also never doubted that my pets loved me and looked to me for guidance. I think they knew I only wanted the best for them. It is that trust that they put in me that stings at times like this. I haven't the hubris to make life and death decisions easily. I don't know how those mad bombers and shooters work up the gall.

But, I must remember that my pets probably didn't expect me to save them from death or harm. So, I'm just being all human about that.

[imafarmgirl.livejournal.com]

Hugs. I am sorry for your loss. This is a beautiful story with your hubby finding the baby bird though.

I had chickens as a kid and once tried to save one with pneumonia by bringing her to live in a cage in my bedroom. Sadly she died anyway.

We do the best we can for them. I've never heard of a love bird living that long.

[rabid1st.livejournal.com]

Thank you! It is a hard thing to deal with, but we don't have the power to save an animal from death at the end. It is more our issue than theirs, I think. But, after years of him looking to me to meet all of his needs, I began to feel responsible for everything. As you say, we can just do the best we can for him.

As for his age, yeah, he was quite the little lovebird miracle. When I first took him to the vet, I was told he'd live about 2 years. I took him in again at age three. And they told me he would live about five or six years. That vet retired. I took him in at six to another vet and they told me he would live about ten years. At ten years, expecting him to die any minutes, I took him to a third avian vet (our current one) who said, "Oh, he will live to about 15." I said, "Come on! Why do you people keep changing his age limit? How long does a lovebird live?" The Internet was no help on this issue, offering widely varying numbers. That's when the vet told me..."A lovebird can live 18-20 years. But most people kill them within two. Average domestic lifespan is five years. Your bird is remarkably happy and healthy."

We did feed him organic food, control toxins in the home and give him attention. But we hardly fussed over him for most of his life. So...it was pretty much down to him. And maybe...the lack of toxins in our home. I have multiple sensitivities, so we have the air as clean as we can get it...no perfumes or microwaves or Teflon pans.

[imafarmgirl.livejournal.com]

Sounds like he was one lucky bird.

[rabid1st.livejournal.com]

He was certainly a blessing.

[auntiesuze.livejournal.com]

I'm so sorry for your loss, but it sounds like Tweetie lived quite a life! Perhaps Tweetie had all the birds stirred up yesterday because I had some amazing sightings. A bald eagle landed on the rocky point across the stream and took a bath for the longest time. And the loon (a quite unusual sight in this area as they aren't particularly fond of tidal rivers), still in its winter plumage, took umbrage to the eagle and was calling out warnings to anyone who would listen (I love the haunting sound of loon calls). And I saw an absolutely gorgeous male cardinal at the feeder off our porch - I wish I could have gotten a photo of him.

[rabid1st.livejournal.com]

Thank you, Suze. And he did have quite a long life. And he certainly loved us, because birds won't cuddle with just anyone. LOL

Ah, the Cardinal Medicine comes to you as well. You have been having an auspicious week.

Not sure if you know or not...but the word auspicious means "The birds are watching." The Greeks thought Zeus used birds to keep an eye on us all. While, of course, the Judeo/Christian religion tells us, God has his eye on the sparrows.

We don't have loons here, as far as I know. So they've never come in Medicine for me.

But...here you go...Loon Medicine is all about keeping your dreams and wishes alive. It represents lucid dreaming and the re-awakening of old desires. And the Eagle is all about self-esteem and self-confidence. Given that your Eagle was bathing, he probably represented a refreshing of your self-confidence. So, you had quite the spiritual encounter there. A thumbs up from the universe for you, I think. GRIN

[auntiesuze.livejournal.com]

It's definitely been a heck of a week and the birds seem to be confirming it! I did not know that about "auspicious", very interesting. I've seen the eagles a lot lately - they are so, so beautiful and powerful, soaring over the water. But seeing the bathing was quite unusual! The mergansers are always out there playing and splashing, but seeing the eagle do it was amazing (and fun!). Guess my self-esteem needed to have the cobwebs dusted off. :)

The loon sighting was incredibly rare. Though they have been known to appear in this area, my mom said it's been a very long time (maybe 10 years) since she'd seen one here. They prefer lakes and non-tidal waters, so this isn't their ideal spot. Boy, you can't miss that call, though. It's so haunting. Keeping my dreams alive? Yep, that sounds about right. The birds certainly seemed to be echoing everything I've been feeling about this new job and the direction my life is headed. I love getting that confirmation - thank you so much for sharing your knowledge with me! :D

P.S. I don't have a bird icon, so I hope Tweetie can forgive me for using a happy cat. :)

[soophelia.livejournal.com]

I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your bird. My heart goes to you and your family. Your bird had a good wonderful life (and the worst thing that you can do is second guess yourself about what you could have done).

*Hugs*