Daunting Realization #3

[rabid1st]

Come this May, I will have been forcibly retired, by sleep disorders and fibromyalgia, for three long years and I haven't so much as a single short story in print. Writing isn't even my hobby anymore.

Comments

[thisficklemob.livejournal.com]

Oh, hon.

{{{{hugs}}}}

People tend to think that being unemployable due to chronic illness should provide lots of time for whatever else -- writing, art, whatever. Even we sickos fall into that trap.

But reality often smacks us upside the head with the fact that disabling chronic illnesses are disabling, and even things other people do for fun or relaxation may be too much for us much of the time.

The cognitive difficulties and losses that come with chronic illness are especially hard to bear for those of us who write. But don't beat yourself up -- sleep disorders, pain, and brainfog are all extremely good reasons to find writing difficult.

[rabid1st.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the hugs!

I know. I know. But I truly miss the passion of writing, being swept up in a good idea and letting it carry me along like a surfer on a big wave. If I may quote a bumper sticker..."Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most."

Also, as you know, it is daunting to realize that your life is just passing by in the fog and you aren't even sure what it looks like these days. I have been struggling with the simplest of tasks...get up and eat breakfast. That's my only goal right now. And I keep failing to do that, because I am either wiped out from a complete lack of sleep or trying to wake up from a drugged sleep.

[thisficklemob.livejournal.com]

Yes. It's been a long time since a scene sprung fully formed into my mind. I miss that.

Yes. Sometimes the best I can do, breakfast-wise, is something pre-made, like a granola bar. (Which are usually worse for me, but what can ya' do.)

[keswindhover.livejournal.com]

Is it really three years? Seems like yesterday.

And get on with that YA novel. *cracks whip*

[rabid1st.livejournal.com]

Yes, Ma'am!

*salutes*

And, to be fair, a large portion of that three years I spent in legal wrangling with assorted parties. So, I have only been in relative peace for about 15 months.