Michael Jackson Gone at 50

[rabid1st]

As a very young girl, I loved to dance and I believe my very first album was Off the Wall, Michael Jackson's first solo album. I used to play Wanna Be Startin' Something over and over again and I thought Michael was exceptionally gorgeous. Later, he changed his nose and I remember planning to write him a fan letter asking him to change it back. I'm not sure if I ever wrote or mailed that letter. And little did I know that he was starting down a path of personal alteration that would...well...make him over into something that didn't even resemble that doe-eyed, chocolate-skinned young man I'd had a crush on as a child.

I suppose when I think of Michael Jackson I think of him as two people. One of those people was remarkably gifted. He could sing. He could dance. He and Madonna defined Pop music for several decades. And without Michael Jackson we probably never would have had MTV. But layered over that is the sad figure of celebrity. Leaving aside the scandals on this day of mourning, I am still saddened by the stark testament that no amount of fame or fortune or talent can make up for losing part of your soul. A lady on the news today was saying Michael Jackson thought too highly of himself, that he was an unchecked narcissist surrounded by enablers. Maybe she's right, I don't know. But, as a complete outsider, it seems to me that the people who knew him, liked him and found him fragile. He spent his whole life trying to eradicate himself and start over, maybe hoping to relive a childhood that was lost to him forever.

Better luck next life, Michael, better luck next life.

Comments

[wickedgillie.livejournal.com]

I find myself surprisingly sad about the whole thing. I thought he was so hot in his Thriller era, as did all the other girls in my 6th grade class. I loved his music. I loved his videos even more. I kept ogling the videos even after his music left me cold because they were such spectacles. It made me really sad to see him driven to self-mutilation and such a regressive immature lifestyle trying to make himself over into Peter Pan and get that stolen childhood back. I never pictured him as an old man, and it's still shocking to me that he could be nearly 51, let alone gone. It's just...surreal.

Better luck next life, indeed. Who might this talented sensitive boy have been without his dad to exploit the Jackson brood?

[frodolass.livejournal.com]

I'm still in shock over it. It seems so.. unreal. One of my earliest memories was of listening to his Thriller album and singing along while taking a bath (my mother was very indulgent of my desire to do all things in the water =P). I remember Mom and I staying up late to watch his Dangerous tour on Pay Per View. I agree that after that point he seemed to become a second, different person in my eyes as well, but old Michael will always be associated with my childhood and I will miss him.

[np-complete.livejournal.com]

I'm wondering what will happen to his children.

[rabid1st.livejournal.com]

Let the tabloid battles begin, I'm afraid!

I don't see this not getting a lot of coverage on TMZ!

[acciochocolate.livejournal.com]

It's rather shocking to lose two icons in one day, and let's don't forget that Ed MacMahon just passed away as well. I went over to the Wiki and started looking up celebrity deaths in just this year. Sad and shocking.

For me also, there's really three Michael Jackons. The kid who fronted the Jackson Five--their hit singles still make me want to dance. :) Then there's the young man of the early 80s leading up to and through "Thriller" and those duets with Sir Paul. And then fame really caught up to him and everything changed. The nose job was in some ways the start of that downhill slide. :( The third MJ was the one that no one could understand or relate to, I suspect.

About MTV--the idea really came from Nickeloden's Pop Rocks! show, which was an idea that Micheal Nesmith (formerly of the Monkees) sold to them. He had been making what we would now call music videos for some time, probably somewhat inspired by the "romps" in the Monkees TV show, which in itself was inspired by the Beatles' films.

And poor Farah Fawcett--too much publicity in her Charlie's Angels days, and not enough since until this last illness. :( I never really watched the show, but that poster of her was everywhere!

[fidesangelus.livejournal.com]

I only ever have memories of the second person but I do appreciate how much the first impacted the world in a positive way. Very sad to see someone die so young.

[auntiesuze.livejournal.com]

I feel the same way as you. I remember spending hours watching him on MTV, trying to learn the "Thriller" dance moves, etc. He had so much talent, but even then he was trying to change himself into someone else. I think he was severely damaged in childhood. Was it the pressures of early fame? Abuse by a father who tried to live out his own dreams through his kids? Being overindulged and overly sheltered his entire life? I don't know. But there is no doubt that he was broken in some fundamental way. As offput as I could be by his increasingly bizarre behavior, I've always felt sorry for him. A classic example of money and fame not even remotely buying happiness. :(

What a week it's been. Ed was old and had been sick for quite a while, so I wasn't too surprised when he died. But then Farrah earlier today shocked me. I didn't realize just how sick she really was. And now this. Let's hope that was our "three" and we're done with celebrity death for a bit.

[princessblue791.livejournal.com]

They say narcissist are forever tormented and hurt by the fact that the world doesn't really revolve around them. I think Micheal felt the world owed him alot for all he went through and when he realized that people aren't that "kind" it crushed him.
It also seems that people are quick to forget about the child molestation allegations. He was never found guilty in a court of law and so the rules of my profession cause me to say they were allegations, the questionable word of others. However there was a pattern, three boys came forward, and the evidence was there. Just MJ could afford good lawyers. I do however think he was innocent by reason of insanity. I don't think he honestly believed he was doing anything wrong. I think he saw himself as a child too is what I'm getting at.