So...I load up Doomsday...so I can listen to the song...

[rabid1st]

...as Rose comes across sea and land to find him, "because he's calling." And I come to the part where she's walking along the beach and she says, "Here I am, at last, and this is the story of how I died." And I just burst out weeping. Now, I am all stuffy nosed and can't sleep.

Because I know she didn't mean...this is where the Doctor told me I was on the list of the dead. HaHa, fooled you into thinking I died. She means...this is where I died...on this beach. This is where life became meaningless and empty for me again. This is where I lost the part of my soul that is still with the man I love more than I loved my mum or anything else.

And dang it...I really want her to have that life with him. :sniff: Both of them deserve it. :snuffle:

Rae
off to take a hot shower to unstuff my nose.

Comments

[beadattitude.livejournal.com]

I know, honey. I know. ::offers you shoulder::

[rabid1st.livejournal.com]

But, :sniff: I don't normally have that reaction. :hiccup:

:leans into your shoulder:

Make it be okay...okay?

Rae

[auntiesuze.livejournal.com]

*huggles*

And now you know how I react every damn time I hear that music or see any of that last part of "Doomsday". *sniffle*

[rabid1st.livejournal.com]

Poor, sweet baby! I feel for you if you have the automatic bawling episodes every time. I usually get a little misty eyed during the "Quite right, too" and also when she's pounding on the wall. But this is probably only the second time I've just felt it was all too much to bear if they were forever separated.

Odd...me having this reaction now we are so very close to them reuniting.

I imagine it's the remote possibility of it all going wrong again...after all they've both suffered that got to me. And I'm an adult...think of what it would do to a child to have his hero suffer like the Doctor has...and then...go on suffering alone. I just can't see children being fatalistic about lost loves.

Rae

[auntiesuze.livejournal.com]

I'm a bit more desensitized to it than I used to be. At least I can *think* about what happened without breaking into sobs!

I think RTD did what he could, given the situation (at least he didn't kill Rose!), but I hadn't really thought about it from a kid's perspective. I imagine that they tend to get more caught up in the moment, but this isn't exactly the greatest lesson. Do great things, kids, and be rewarded with...loneliness...and pain...and death. Um...yea?

I need some sort of happy ending, dammit!

[rabid1st.livejournal.com]

Well...we think children don't notice things...but I believe they notice quite a bit. Ever had one ask you "Why is your nose that funny shape?" or...say "You're arms are hairy?"

I believe they notice quite a lot and put it together in a way that adults might not. Like Julia Gardner saying the five year old saw Donna and said "the Doctor has another princess." But that doesn't mean that the little girl forgot about Rose being lost.

I think the idea of people being lost is a major one for children. It's something they understand...a close to the heart fear. What if they got lost? Would their loved ones come looking for them? The Doctor is supposed to make everything okay. The reason they can watch and be scared of the monsters...is becaue they know the Doctor is on their side.

This is what they most likely believe. That he can make things okay. So...the very idea that he could want something and NOT get it...might be quite traumatic to them.

There are people who believe children should be taught that lesson. Yes, even your heroes can't get what they want...nobody gets to be happy in the end. But I would wager you NONE of those stories get told down through time. The stories that get told again and again are the fairytale stories where the evil is defeated and the prince finally comes for his princess.

Because even at our age that resonates with us...it's what we WANT to happen. The people who don't want it to happen for the Doctor and Rose...want it to happen for THEM and the Doctor or for the Doctor and their favorite companion...or they are so afraid of it happening that they don't want to believe it exists for anyone. The old...I can't be happy like that so nobody else can be happy either.

Talk of it "ruining the show" is pure bunk. It wouldn't ruin anything. The show could go right on...picking up just as it did when it came back on the air. We missed a huge slice of the Doctor's life there...we missed the Time War, the loss of his people and planet and his regeneration into Nine. So, Ten goes to Rose and lives out her life and has kids and grandkids and then we pick up with an older Ten or with Eleven...and there are one or two passing references to the lost years...so what?

Course...preaching to the choir again...I noticed that you and Swankkat have been with me all along in my ceaseless ranting about where the storyline should go next. How you suffer!

[wickedgillie.livejournal.com]

My four year old is convinced that the Doctor will come back for Rose if he can find the right door to open in that big white wall. She doesn't want Rose and the Doctor to be sad any more.

[rabid1st.livejournal.com]

See? Children believe in him. And they don't have that cynical part that says, "Oh, well...life goes on."

They may not react sadly or ask about Rose all the time, but that's only because they think the Doctor will find her. They certainly are aware that Rose and the Doctor are both sad. They know the Doctor can do anything. And I would wager if you asked anyone under 8 who hasn't had a parent explain that Rose is gone forever...what will happen...they will tell you that the Doctor will rescue Rose.

Especially, because the show has spoken of her as "trapped" and "lost." Those are both words that kids relate to very well. And kids don't mind someone they don't know dying...like in Voyage of the Damned...all those dead people...they get over them immediately. But someone they care about being lost...they will worry about that.

Rae

[auntiesuze.livejournal.com]

Awwwww. That's so sweet!

[auntiesuze.livejournal.com]

Yes, my dear, I completely agree with you about how the storyline should go. :)

I don't see any reason why the Doctor couldn't have a perfectly lovely little life with Rose - off camera, since I know they won't do it *on* camera - and the pick back up with Ten regenerating.

There are great big chunks of the Doctor's life that we don't know about. Everything up to that first episode (when we know that he and Susan have been traveling for a bit) - that's hundreds of years. The "bits inbetween" - what happens between episodes or between Christmas specials and the main season? Decades could pass and we'd have no idea.

And kids? Yes, far too observant. Did I ever tell you about my (then 3 or 4 year old) nephew barging in on me changing and asking why my "meeples" (nipples/breasts) were pointing down. Thanks, kid. *laughs ruefully*

[audrey1nd.livejournal.com]

I was totally sobbing through half that episode. My mom thought it was very sad as well. She now refuses to watch Doctor Who because it either scares her or makes her upset.

[rabid1st.livejournal.com]

Awww! Huggles your mom. And you, too.

Doctor Who, I believe, is heading for the happy ever after...or happy for Rose's lifetime at least...solution. But your mom should wait for confirmation before she watches it in reruns.

Rae

[principia.livejournal.com]

We may have discussed this already, but the original TARDISode for Doomsday was going to be the Doctor laying flowers at Rose and Jackie's 'graves.' You wanna talk misleading... now, if it had been Jack doing so, that totally would've worked.

[rabid1st.livejournal.com]

See? This is what I mean about RTD misleading people about the whole death thing. He WANTS us to think Ten is going to die. And because we all know how Doctor Who goes...it is the first thing everyone thinks. So, it's perfect. It is like me suggesting the Rose Godhood in Disheveled. I know all along what I intend to do in the end...but I also know that people will take my suggestion, via the Doctor's awe of her, as some sign of her becoming a Time Lady or Time Goddess or something.

Rae
imagining (or hoping) RTD is just as good at this as I am. Historically, I've had trouble respecting storytellers who can't sprinkle in subtle clues and add them up later. Though, really...there is nothing very subtle about the Doctor/Rose love story...I think the people that miss it are completely blinded by their own belief systems.

[keswindhover.livejournal.com]

You big sap.

[rabid1st.livejournal.com]

It is true. I'm pathetic. I really didn't cry all this time. I've always thought she meant that she was dead inside without him, though. But it never made me suddenly burst into tears like that before...I want them to be happy...for her lifetime. I just do.

:sticking my tongue out at you: ;-b

Rae

[keswindhover.livejournal.com]

:sticking my tongue out at you:

Hah - I know if I tickle your tummy you'll just roll over.

[rabid1st.livejournal.com]

:rolls over at the suggestion of tummy tickling:

:smirks up at you:

Rae

[rjrog77.livejournal.com]

I've always thought she meant that she was dead inside without him, though.

As soon as I'd established that she wasn't physically dead, that's what I thought too.

(And I have massive problems with my ability to watch that episode too, these days. Particularly the part where she tells him she loves him. I can't bear it any more.)

[rabid1st.livejournal.com]

You know...this is the thing...it's gotten worse for me. Originally, I was angry...then after a couple sleepless nights, I figured out my theories about this being the only way RTD could reunite them. I figured he would lobby to get Billie back (if he hadn't arranged it with her already) for David's last episode. But also, I felt that if the BBC wouldn't let him allow the Doctor that life, that he could eventually write the novel. My hope was that he would be allowed to end the story happily, back then.

And there is part of my journal from the night after Doomsday aired.

http://rabid1st.livejournal.com/83873.html

I think I say it there. Not how the story is supposed to end...with them separated.

Rae

[jackiemust-die.livejournal.com]

i cried too.
i couldn't help it.
it was the way she said it and she sounded so sad.

[bubbles234.livejournal.com]

"She means...this is where I died...on this beach. This is where life became meaningless and empty for me again. This is where I lost the part of my soul that is still with the man I love more than I loved my mum or anything else." < I so made that into a fic xD

Although really: Dx and some major RTD rage for Doomsdayness D: