Well, the problem I have with that kind of insult is its necessary corollary that being feminine is a problem, or that things associated with femininity are 'bad'. It's a problem for men that they can lose their 'man-club membership' and I hate that they have this huge fear of displaying traits our society calls feminine. It's especially frustrating when you study the history of emotions at all, because it becomes even more obvious that these are cultural-, class- and period-specific behaviors, not inherently gendered, so why the fear? It used to be manly to cry, for instance. Appropriate manly hair has gone from long to short and back again over the years. It was manly to wear makeup for a while. Argh! So why shove the current 'negatives' off on women and worry you're acting womanly, or someone else might perceive your actions as feminine.
So, doesn't really address your friend's immediate problem, but that's the root of my problem with gender stereotyping, anyway.
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Date: 2010-08-12 12:26 am (UTC)So, doesn't really address your friend's immediate problem, but that's the root of my problem with gender stereotyping, anyway.